Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize