It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize