She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
