So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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