found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
then he tried to convert me to islam
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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