Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
