batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
