Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Randomize
