I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
