the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
