let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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