All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
