piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I think weed is turning my hair brown
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
