waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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