Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
