nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize