Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Dicks are not precious.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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