I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
