turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Randomize
