I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Randomize
