how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
