Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
