I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
accomplished twins. life is a go
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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