so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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