I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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