I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
i think i just lost a toe
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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