you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Randomize
