Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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