You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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