And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
