she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Randomize
