My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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