he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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