You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize