Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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