Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
