I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
