Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
