ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
