today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
