DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
