So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
