my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
