god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
