No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
