she woke up with a sticky ear
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
