Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
