And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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