all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
