Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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