If i come over, it means nothing
barbara walters just said penis...
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
