I smell stomach acid.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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